Up the block from my apartment, there is a grown man wearing a white lab coat and a rainbow beanie with a spinning propeller on top.
And he’s tooling around the sidewalk on a scooter.
And he’s getting paid to do it.
He’s apparently a gimmick for the toy store up the street. They’ll send him out on nice days to tool around in front of the store to attract attention and perhaps drum up a little business.
And today, there is sunshine.
Now the real question is: how do I score a gig like that?
I’ve been waiting and begging and crying for Spring to pay us a visit and that fickle bitch’s breath is all over this city teasing us with warm breezes and blue skies and I wanted to see if maybe she and I could get into a little girl on girl action today before she takes her tease outta town for the weekend.
If it weren’t for rent and food and clothing and things, I wouldn’t even be here, under these fluorescent lights. I’d be reading trashy novels in the grass somewhere.
Fucking hierarchy of needs.
Yes, I’m probably a little bit premature in whining about this stuff already. I am sure there will be plenty of other beautiful days in my near future I’ll miss and bemoan.
But for now, I’ve just come back in for the day and I’ve got a computer and a little time on my hands.
And I must remember this: Spring means car windows are rolled down. Must now be a little more discreet when driving in the car screaming:
with you my darling…”
along with the Aklaline Trio’s “Radio”.
I am sure the old lady in the car next to me is over it by now, but you could tell I had her momentarily spooked.
Sorry elderly lady in the Taurus.
Hey, know what?
There’s a road trip in my future!
My best friend in the male category Brain has been trying to get me to get my slacker ass out to Seattle to visit for the longest time now. And I’ll be honest with you, I could use a little R & R.
And you know what that means.
Ann-frank + best friend in the female category Jen + Ford Zx3 + obnoxious mix tapes x miles and miles of national parks to sleep in + gas station coffee to drink and big ass balls of twine to see = Good. Motherfucking. Times.
The last time I saw that part of the country was The Great Ann-Frank Family Vacation of ’76.
The five year old me + my 4 older siblings + the family german Sheppard + tons of camping equipment in the back of the imitation wood paneling 1972 station wagon = the guarantee your children will only be allowed to use safety scissors upon their return as they are now considered officially insane after that much family bonding.
Since I was only 5 at the time, my sense of time and space was a little skewed. Because up until I was like, 25 years old I could have sworn we were gone traveling around the whole U.S. for an entire 3 months.
Turns out we were only out for 2 weeks.
Mount Rushmore. Bad Lands. Devil’s Tower. Old Faithful.
There’s a picture of the 5 of us kids in front of every one of those landmarks. Sporting the 1970’s hair, buster browns and tube socks, dirt in our ears and big smiles on our faces.
So it wasn’t all bad.
And I am looking forward to big things during the ’02 repeat.
Like Best Friend and Partner in Crime Jen MINUS the ability to drive stick = extra special good times.
But we won’t sweat that. She’s a quick study and what she doesn’t learn in the next month and a half she can just pick up along the way.
The real problem lies in creating some sweet-ass CB Handles for the trip.