Totally depressed. Probably from lack of sleep and poisoning myself with cheap wine.
Totally out of it at grocery store - wandered into 12 Items or less aisle by mistake - didn't realize mistake until I'd emptied half the cart, ready to roll ... girl at check out was kind enough to be as loud as possible when pointing out my error:
she said"EXCUSE ME ... I said EXCUSE ME MA'AM ... this is TWLEVE (points to sign) That's a DOZEN (gee, thanks for pointing that out) items or less line ..."
I wanted to chuck the jar of Skippy at her, instead I smiled "Do I have to move?"
What I wanted to say Well thanks... thanks for making such an unecessary ruckus. I have certainly learned my lessson as I am a bad, bad human being. I will surely burn in hell for all eternity as every sin I've commited serves as a match to light that eternal flame.
Now, can I please buy these Cheez-Its and let's get on with it?
What I actually said: "oh, ok, thanks"
Oh, stop. You would have done the same thing